On the cusp

I'm on the cusp.. 6 months left of uni, college of law then, whatever is next :)

I rediscovered a beautiful passage on womanhood last night and I was thrilled.
proverbs 31, a woman who fears the Lord...

"strength and dignity are her clothing,
And she laughs at the things to come"

I am not afraid but excited. Nervous, sometimes, terrified, yes but joyfully excited about life that is to come.
I was hearing about the idea of a habitational relationship with God rather than a visitational one and how the knowledge that he is ALWAYS with you changes everything..

I'll write more on that when I'm not getting bus sick on my way to uni!

Abide in me, he said. Abide.
laugh and be joyful, the world is not so bad with that truth on hand!
In love x

For Freedom!!!

I haven't written in a while,
which seems wrong.. i always have something to say.
always.
i think maybe i was having issues with attaching images or something..
anyway, for now that will not stop me. this is just it, i'll just write. that's all i ever really wanted to do.

i wrote this about a month before christmas last year, a while ago anyway..

"freedom"

We fight for freedowm, as though it would solve all our problems.
We fight and we long for it;
religious freedom, sexual freedom, political freedom,

~what if i told you you already had it?

you are free

free to choose;
we just often choose to be slaves again,

But we are free.

Free to live, to die, free to dance and grind,
to sing or worship, free to love, or lust,
to hurt or hug.
Free to judge, to be humble,
Free to be selfish or selfless,
Free to do what we want, when we want.
Free to kick and scream,
or encourage and enrich.
Free to bitch and moan,
or move along.
Free to give ~ or take,
Free to do whatever we please.

I know of a man, or rather a king, a god, who was free.
Free to do whatever he wanted.
He made the rules.

So, whilst we are free,
there are consequences,
ours i suppose is a consequential freedom.
His was not.

His was uncontained, unrestrained, unconsequential.
For him at least.
He could ACTUALLY do whatever he wanted.
No one could say he was wrong,
because like i said:
he made the rules.

He could make all the ice cream in all the world and stuff his face til the cows came home.
He could play games with the wee humans,
tossing lightning bolts back and forth,
toying with us like the insignificant ants we are.
He could shake the world up and down,
or he could just start again,
after all, we stuffed up, we didn't care for him. or his funny rules.
He could've left us to the consequences of the freedom he gave us
~the consequences of our rebellion,
where we "freely chose" to do what we wanted, when we wanted.
He could've left us to hell.

But he didn't.

He saw the measly ants,
insignificant though we are,
and he stepped down from the heighest heights.
From his glorious palace,
His place of honour and awe.
He gave up his crown, his throne, his footstool.
~freely, might I add.

Freely, he gave it all up.

And stepped down.

To be born in a lowly manger
~what a strange King?
Royalty, in a manger.
With the cows and the sheep.
The hay and manure..

what a funny king indeed.

Fresh pickings

So I guess I’m a gardener now, an old woman who plays in her garden and drinks loads of tea

I got on the train with a friend the other day and made her look at the photos I’d taken of my garden, and I’ve been showing it off all through Christmas and want to talk about it with everyone and anyone who’ll dare pretend to listen.

But now, I’ve found an alternative, a better option I suppose. THE INTERNET!! Because you can’t refuse, you have to listen. And by you, i mean the world wide web which doesn’t really have a heart or soul to care anyway....

Oh well, it’s a place to ramble. SO. This is my garden, you can’t really see it, since you’re not really here, but these are some of the plants I’m growing. It’s mostly a herb garden, it started with some basil, some coriander, mint and some grape tomatoes (which the pictures do no justice for, they are going absolutely insane!).

I also planted some lavender coz it smells sooo good, but they haven’t really taken off yet – not as fast growing as the herbs, i planted a dwarf lime which has the same issue, maybe next Christmas i’ll get some limes! Since then the garden’s really developed i think, the rule of thumb is that anything that grows has to smell really good or be edible. My nursery man made me break that rule when he told me to plant some flowers to climb up this ladder I have in the garden... hmm you really need to see it. Next time I’ll put a picture of the whole garden. So anyway, I’ve gotta go out now but you’ve had a taste... kind of... I have, and the taste is wonderful! The herbs are delicious and the tomatoes are the sweetest I’ve ever had!

let it rain

as the day reaches an end,
the heat, more than i can bear,
the earth, dry.
the sun has scorched,
burning, frying, drying..
now hear the cry,
how she longs...
let it rain.

break the silence,
break the pain,
break the heat
that's breaking me.

slowly, surely,
the rain it falls,
sporadic at first,
drops, full and heavy
one by one, they slowly come,
and then, the clouds they cannot hold;
let it rain,
let it rain,
let it rain.

move forward. must. move. forward.

i need you like a breath of fresh air;
holding on when it's time to move forward
clutching at the past when the future eagerly beckons
lost in a space of time, a sea of emotions,
dazed and confused i'll look to you.
coz i'm needing something new
and i know, somewhere deep within,
that something starts with you.

Your Location is Set to: De Pere, Wisconsin

I spent the first half of this year on exchange in Wisconsin. Part of the deal was that I submit an article to our online international studies magazine. This is what I submited. It was chosen by the editor as Best Globe Article, I'm not sure if that's based on poor competition or a legitimate attempt, but I thought I'd share it ~ it'll at least give you a glimpse as to what I've been up to. This was only the beginning of my travels this year though; Mexico, England, Scotland, Finland and Thailand will have to wait for another day :)

Flash Back to Reality

I knew as soon as I found that Coles dollar, lost amidst my foreign coins I would fit right back in as though I had never left. As though the hours of flying, the miles I’d traveled were some other life, as though this incredible experience was something separate, something that had happened months ago to someone other than me.

It’s easy to fit back in, but it’s hard to forget. I don’t know if I ever will or ever could.

I spent my last semester on exchange in the small town of De Pere, Wisconsin at the beautiful college of St Norbert. I arrived to find snow up to my elbows and a wind that would whip through every layer of my clothing – despite the jackets, scarves, gloves and many, many layers I wore beneath. I also arrived to find a community excited to invite me in and make me a part of it. I met friends, professors, even administrative staff who were so kind to me and who I will always remember with such fondness. I became a part of life on campus, and it became my life.

I didn’t honestly think I would fall for the United States the way that I did. But I loved it, every minute of it: from the joy of seeing snow, real snow, falling for the very first time, to birthdays and parties with new friends and a Spring Break adventure that took me all the way to Colorado and Utah and everywhere in between… I don’t know if I can capture the adventure in so few words, but I hope I can at least give you a glimpse. I also hope that if you ever have the chance you make your way out on exchange, you do. Wherever you might go, I have no doubt that as it was for me, it will be for you; “ever changing and always amazing”.

PS. If you want to read it twice and check it out in its full published glory, check out: Flash Back to Reality, Macquarie Globe

The Incredibles: Superheroes in Disguise

I look around, sitting on buses, trains, in crowded lecture theatres, in busy streets and quiet cafes, and I think to myself, what of these people? Who are they? What secrets do they hold?

Well ok, if we’re being honest it started with me, and how no one knows me, how I can be like a closed book, until you choose to ask me almost anything, for given the freedom to speak I undoubtedly will. But I did wonder, or do wonder, because there is much of me that you don’t know, may never know. I mean, I sit on the bus as an average, everyday person, sit in a crowded lecture theatre as a bored and tired student, craving a coffee and any excuse to escape the monotony that’s become my life. I sit in a cafe as a lonely individual, busy reading her book and drinking her tea. But there’s more, to me, and you.

What if the person sitting next to me in the lecture theatre today is the next Chief Justice of the Supreme Court, well not the next, but maybe the one after that. What if that kid on the bus who can’t sit still and is always playing with his basketball is that way because he’s going to be a pro basketballer, the next Michael Jordan? What if you’re a secret genius? An undercover superhero? What if you just have a really interesting story that’s bursting to get out, but no one’s willing to listen? What if we stopped thinking so much about ourselves and our stories and asked. Would that be weird? ~Maybe.

Me and a friend sat in a coffee shop the other day and people watched, curiously. We looked to the couple at our left and wondered whether this was a first date, a fifth or maybe a habit they’ve formed after years of being together. The guys down the end, one in business attire, the other plain clothed, friends? Out on business matters? Then two guys walked in with big cameras, slung around their necks; what are they doing with their cameras? Are they professionals or just tourists enjoying the view and taking a break from their busy sightseeing. And what about you; what’s your story, your hidden talent?

I was discussing with another group of friends our hidden superhero strength, I suppose everyone’s got something, some are more useful than others. I can raise my ear lobes, a talent I honed during my last year of school, a new form of procrastination, effective even in the most dire of moments, you don’t need any extra props, food, a kitchen, a room to clean, just you and your ears. I’m thinking of showing it off at my next interview, and then, when they think they’ve seen enough, I’ll ask for the exit and show them my other superhero strength – I’ll moonwalk right out of there! Another of my friends has a talent slightly more useful, she can carry any number of grocery bags you throw at her. Mostly I think it’s because she refuses to go back twice, her arms will recover but having to walk back for a second load just takes too much effort. One girl I know can literally just hear a piece of music and play it, maybe that’s not so freaky in the music world, but to me, if she was doing that when she was three, it’s kind of impressive. I know one guy who got top grades even when he had glandular fever. I get jealous of those kinds of talents, the useful ones. I’ve met people who’ve travelled the world and you’d never know until you do the math and realise they didn’t start university until years after they finished school, then when they start filling in the gaps I’m floored because I like to think I’ve travelled a lot.

It’s funny, you just never know I guess. I mean there’s stuff I don’t even know about myself, but with you? I have no idea. Apparently, my friend knows this guy who works as a security guard now, but back in the day he was doing Ironman and massive triathlons in Hawaii – where you swim for over 3km, ride for 180 and then have to run a marathon – over 40kms, isn’t that insane? And you’d never know. Unless you asked I suppose.

I don’t know if I’m all of a sudden going to become that overly curious nosy no good so and so, but I tell you what, people have a story to tell. An interesting one at that. Coz it just might be that Joe Blogs who lives down the road is Mr Incredible after all.